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Sunday, March 30, 2014
This week has been exciting! You got the groundskeeper position that you wanted! This means that we get to move into our new apartment this week! My next few days will be spent packing while you’re at work. Then we’ll move. Then we’ll unpack. Then I will tackle our enormous laundry mountain because we will have a WASHER & DRYER in our new place! Yay! This job couldn’t have come at a better time. This will be the first place we’ve moved to since we’ve gotten married. I am excited to decorate and make our new place feel like home. Even though we’re only moving fifteen minutes away from where we currently are (and in the same city), it feels like a new start. I’m happy that we’ll get to make new memories there. Every day I realize more and more that you’re my best friend. You’re the one that I want to tell everything to and experience everything with. That’s a best friend. In my head I used to make fun of the people that say corny things like “I married my best friend”. But as it turns out, I think I really married mine. And that feels pretty sweet.
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
This past week we celebrated St. Patrick’s Day with a party at home with friends. We had a great time playing charades. You were awesome! It really meant a lot to me that you not only participated but gave it 100%. You seriously make me laugh every day. You even tried all of the Irish food despite you not being really big on trying new foods. That made me feel good too. So many little things you do go such a long way. I really hope that we have more get-togethers like that. You and the guys also went on your annual pilgrimage to see Children of Bodom. I’m so glad that you got to go but I missed you like crazy. I miss you so intensely when you’re away. I was so happy when you got back. Things just aren’t as entertaining without you here. We’re eight weeks into our marriage and I’m feeling very hopeful. I’m imagining what our future looks like: what careers we’ll have, where we’ll live, the trips we’ll take, the friends we’ll make. When I used to think about what I wanted in my future husband, I knew that I wanted someone smart, witty, funny, a lover of music (and a bonus if they could sing!), someone who was handsome and a great lover. You are all of those things. I am so thankful for you every day. As lame as it might sound, I swear I wished for you.
Sunday, March 16, 2014
Let’s be real: sometimes I want to wring your neck. Sometimes I’m sure you have less than pleasant thoughts about me. However, those times are few and far-between. Most of the time you make it incredibly easy for me to love you. The times that I know I love you the most are probably when it’s the most difficult to love you as a person. We both learn things about each other every day. We’re both still figuring out how this healthy relationship thing works. We are still learning how each other tick and what ticks us off. We’re both growing as people and as a couple. What I do know is that there is no one else that I would rather have as my partner. I want to see us both reach our full potential and really work toward achieving goals/dreams. You are meant for great things, Matt. I know it. I can feel it. You are so much more than you’ve ever thought you were. Truth be told, we’ve both been in a mid-twenties funk lately and we really need to get out of it. I know that once we really start making some things fall into place we’ll be able to stress out a little less. Whether we’re in a mansion or a cardboard box, I want to be there with you…. But I’d prefer a mansion…. or a Craftsman or Victorian (ya know, whatever). This week has showed me that while we still have things to work on (as all people do), progress can be made. I love each sweet look you give me, the way your face looks and your voice sounds when you tell me you love me, the way we can’t kiss each other just once, and sleeping beside you each night. Most of all, I think I love the comfortable sweetness of knowing that you’re all mine and I’m all yours.
Friday, March 7, 2014
You had an interview for a new job today that you really want and I hope you get. I hope we both find jobs we like soon. We also went to our friend’s house and held her adorable newborn daughter. (This did not help my baby fever at all!) We’ve been around A LOT of babies lately. It’s ridiculous. I know that when the time is right we’ll have a little one.
I want us to hurry up and be successful so we don’t have to stress out so much for the rest of our lives. I want a house and money to actually be able to do the things we want. I know one day I will think about how things are now: our one bedroom apartment, the million cats that live outside, our one car (White Zombie), our lack of a washer & dryer and the pain in the ass it is to not have them, our less than plentiful wardrobes, and the stress of our finances. The one thing that I would not change is the love we have for each other. I know that no matter how mad I get at you, I am still uncontrollably, unwaveringly, in love with you. –And I know without a shadow of a doubt that you love me to. I hope that we never stop saying “I love you” as much as we do. I hope we never stop giving as many kisses or hugs as we do. Six weeks in and I am still 100% positive that you were the person I was supposed to marry and that feels pretty awesome.
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
We’re five weeks in and I still love you every single day--- even the ones that you make me mad. I visited a friend and felt her stomach as her baby moved inside her today. It brought tears to my eyes and made me realize how much I want to feel that feeling. We’re not trying to have a kid. I know it’s not the right time in many ways. But I do like thinking about the possibility of one day having a kid with you---- a little Smith. Even though I have baby fever at the moment, I’m thoroughly enjoying my time with you while it’s just us. I know that there will come a time when we’ll wish for this time--- when between feedings and changings and the picking up of many colorful toys we’ll wish for a moment that we could have time for ourselves and sleep in. Right now though, I’m imagining our lives then. Every time I see you with a kid it makes me weak. You would be an amazing dad. I know it. I can feel it. There’s no one else on this earth that I know would be a better loving, protective, playful, awesome, father. One day it’ll be our turn to join that other side of adulthood like so many of our other friends have. For now, I’m happy to just be able to sit with you on our couch and watch countless episodes of our favorite shows on Netflix and curl up with you at night. I love being your wife every day. It always feels new and exciting and yet comfortable like this is just how it was supposed to be.
It’s been four weeks! Yay! It’s weird because it seems like such a short amount of time and yet it feels like we’ve been together forever. This week we’ve talked about ideas and goals. I want so much for us to achieve everything we want to. I have so much faith in you, so much hope for you, and so much love. I know that sometimes life gets stressful, but I feel so much better knowing that I have you.
We’re in the middle of the “snowpacalypse” right now. Today it was great to see you play in the snow. You looked like a kid again. It kind of makes me want to move somewhere where it snows more during the winter just so I can see that huge grin of yours when you play in it.